Midlife is overrated

I was chatting with a friend this morning. We were both venting about the latest bullshit that’s been thrown our way. We do this knowing that there are much bigger problems in the world, but our venting is therapeutic. It’s absolutely possible to be thankful for so much and still recognize, accept, and talk about the shity stuff.

Midlife hits hard. When your younger life is kinder. Time seems endless, your skin has more than its share of collagen, and your 401k doesn’t seem that important. When you hit the midlife wall, time seems to fly, your skin shows the neglect from years of under appreciation, and you realize that your 401k needs a steroid, and fast.

You have kids that you worry about and care for. Then your parents start to get to the stage in their life where you worry and try to care for them. I now know what it’s called midlife. You are literally in the middle of being a parent, and being a child. It’s a very surreal place to be. Wanting to be the problem solver, but knowing damn well you are nothing more than a spectator. The kids don’t listen to you. The parents might listen, but they are going to do whatever they want anyway, and they aren’t at the stage where you get to call the shots.

This week was the first week of school. I prefer to call it hell week. My intention of having them seasoned to the morning routine a week before is always good, but never happens. Going from waking up at 11am to 6am is a killer. Fight or flight little people.

I’m sure there’s been many things that have happened this week that are blog worthy, but frankly I’ve been so busy, that I haven’t had time, and now I’ve forgotten. So let’s just focus on yesterday.

I got to spend time with my oldest. She’s 22 years old and a spitting image of me. Spunky, opinionated and winging it. I had to bring Brogan to the Chiropractor so she was home at the house alone for a bit. While she was here she decided to pick up for me. She opened Addisons lunch box and decided it was worthy of a snap chat video, which I’m so glad she did. I’m opposite of a helicopter mom. If my kids want cold lunch, they pack it. If not there is money in their lunch account. Well Addisons lunch consisted of a Hershey bar, some raspberries, Cool Ranch Doritos and an entire bag of Cheetos. My bad, but in my defense, at least she had raspberries.

Brogan is a freshman this year. He’s playing football and baseball. Unfortunately he has been nursing a hip injury, and now a damn ankle thing. The good news is he’s seeing the best Chiropractor in town. Last week Doc took him off practice for 2 days to rest the hip. He sent us home with a chiro gun and instructions on icing. Well of course everyone fought over the damn chiro gin so I bought one. If you haven’t tried it, they are pretty amazing. After Wednesday nights game I sent out an SOS to Doc Scott. He wanted to see him Thursday morning. We left with one hell of a worked out hip and a script for some Hokas. Have you ever tried to get a freshman boy into a pair of Hokas. Let’s say wrestling an alligator would be easier.

We walked into Gazelle and got the nicest sales guy. His name was Dave. I gave Dave the note that Doc had written and he knew exactly what we needed. He brought out a few boxes and as soon as he opened them I could see the look of terror. You want to knock a cocky kid down a few notches, put a pair of Hokas on him and make him walk around. Although I’m sure they would work magic and help him tremendously I knew there was no way in hell he would wear them. I pulled Dave aside and explained the situation. He delivered a few other options and Brogan picked out a pair of ASICS that he didn’t hate. I’ll settle for don’t hate. We grabbed a pair of insoles while we were there for his cleats. Apparently he needs new cleats too. Anyone looking for part time help?

We left Gazelles and I had to stop at Sam’s club. I needed laundry detergent and vinegar. I bought some magic laundry detergent off Amazon for jerseys, but heard that you need to soak everything in vinegar first to remove build up. At this point I’ll try anything. As soon as we walked in there was a palate of rubber mulch on sale. I actually need it to finish the patio, so they somehow jammed 20 bags in my car. My guys are the best.

I also bought a cake. It’s not my birthday, it’s actually no ones birthday. Some days just require cake. Yesterday was one of those days.